ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend I've been thinking about cutting ties with for a while now, but I feel conflicted about it. I've noticed that the way he treats people, including me, is questionable. Whenever I need help or support, he seems to be conveniently busy or unavailable, yet he expects everyone else to drop what they're doing to be ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I accidentally referred to my friend with the wrong pronouns, and they snapped at me! We've been friends for nearly a year now, but I introduced them to some new friends and used the pronoun "she" to describe something about them. I felt awful. Just as quickly as I was about to correct myself, they were already yelling at me. ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a college student, and I have moved several hours away from home to attend my dream school in New York City. I feel guilty for moving away from my family, especially since for the majority of my life, it's just been me, my mom and my little sister. My 10-year-old little sister keeps reminding me how much she misses me, and ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, I spent a weekend with friends my husband and I met on the beach a few years ago. We all really liked each other, so it felt natural to invite them to stay with us one weekend when a lot of mutual friends were gathering since they didn't have a beach rental this year. It was great spending time with these new friends, ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently in the middle of a career pivot. For many years, I worked in corporate offices behind the scenes in operations. I still do that now in a more creative industry. In this role, I get to show my personal interests, style and creative capabilities a lot more. As a result, a lot of people have been telling me that I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I don't think my sister and brother-in-law are doing a good job of raising their two daughters, who are 10 and 12. Whenever I visit, I notice the girls are often left to their own devices with little guidance or discipline. They talk back to adults, spend hours glued to their phones or tablets, and don't seem to have boundaries ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: At the end of the summer, I went back home to celebrate my mom's birthday. Since I got married and moved, I don't get to see my family as often, so I was looking forward to the quality time. We all got together at my parents' house -- my siblings, their families, my wife and me -- for dinner and some fun. During the opening ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just started my new job, and my boss has given me little guidance. When I reach out with questions, the responses are either short, vague or delayed. I was expecting some kind of structured onboarding or training, or at least regular check-ins to help me transition smoothly, but that hasn't happened. Most days I'm left trying ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter, a high school junior, recently broke her leg, and it has turned our whole household upside down. She is a dedicated volleyball player and has been training nonstop for years. This was supposed to be her big season when college coaches would get to see her play and potentially recruit her. Unfortunately, she's now ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was invited to a gathering at a nightclub this weekend, and I sat with a private group of people who provided table service. It was very chic until random people started to sneak up and try to pour themselves free drinks from our bar setup. One woman came and sat with our group, even though we didn't know her; she tried to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friends and I are studying abroad in Europe, and we like to explore the party scene here. The clubs are strict -- they have security guards, and apparently everyone expects you to wear high heels and tiny dresses, neither of which are really my style. My friends and their tiny dresses were approved by the bouncer, but my mom ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently adopted a dog, and while I'm excited to have a new companion, I'm realizing it's a lot more responsibility than I anticipated. My schedule is hectic, and I'm struggling to find enough time for walks, training and giving him the attention he needs. On top of that, my dog has started chewing on furniture, getting into ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: About a month ago, I reconnected with an old friend from college. I was visiting his city, and we bumped into each other and have been talking ever since. He made plans to come visit me and will be here next week. I've never dated long-distance before, so being able to go out and do things together is ideal, but he didn't consult...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently have become friends with a group of older women. We get along great and have had some wonderful conversations and enjoyable times hanging out together. The thing is, they have way more time on their hands than I do. They are either fully retired or semi-retired. They have no problem spending a leisurely afternoon ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm trying to manage my social life as an adult and explore new ways to make friends. I always made friends at school, with kids in my grade or from my classes, but now navigating the real world on my own, without proximity and closed environments to steer the way, has been challenging. An acquaintance invited me to a gathering ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister recently went through a divorce, and it's been difficult for her. She has two young kids, and I can see how overwhelmed and stressed she is, trying to juggle her work, taking care of the kids, managing the household and trying to keep her life on track. I want to be there for her, but I'm not sure of the best way to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Summer is over, but I feel like my staff is still working at less than full capacity. Every year, I give them time off during the summer, which usually includes half days off on Fridays and shorter hours. The expectation is always that they will crank it up when the fall comes. It seems, though, that everyone is asleep at the ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was riding the subway during an off-peak hour. There were a few other passengers in my train car but still a lot of empty seats. A few stops into my ride, a seemingly unhoused person got onto my train, and as he sat down, four or five people got up and switched their seats to move away from him. I was already on the other end ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I, along with a few family friends, needed to travel to Canada for a funeral. We decided it would be more economical to drive, so I booked the rental vehicle. Our friends let us know that they'd send us their contribution before we hit the road. The day before our departure, they called, saying they might just take a ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage daughter is upset with me because I told her she couldn't go to a concert with her friends. The show is in a nearby city, and while she insists everyone else's parents are letting them go, I don't feel comfortable with her being out so late in such a large, unsupervised crowd. She's 15, and the concert would end well ...Read more